The need to categorise is a catastrophe.
Ever noticed how people like to label others? Ever wondered why as a human race people feel the NEED to do this?
“You’re damaged goods”, “you won’t ever be capable of love”, “That’s like child abuse!”, “you’re crazy and weird”
These were all actual comments made by silly people around me as I grew up, all because I was raised in a single parent house hold with a strong mother fulfilling both parental roles with ease and grace.
A brief throwback: my parents got divorced when I was about 6 years old because my dad was cheating on my mum, was never at home, never supported my family and to be completely honest was, and still is a massive dodgy dealer/ wanker banker (BIG UP). Not to categorise of course!**** My family went through a lot but we are wayyyy over the negative effects of him and are out the other side and completely better off for it.
Stereotypes are a funny thing. I honestly believe that stereotypes are around because people like to put you in a box, for whatever reason. People don’t know how to understand or stomach you if you don’t fit into a definite category. It’s how people deal with their own insecurities, by putting others down. It helps them feel better about themselves.
“Oh she is blonde, so must be dumb”, “He is posh, so much be a twat”, “They’re not size 6 so must be ugly”, “He is clever so must be a loser”.
We’ve all heard it before, to be honest films like Means Girls really don’t help teenagers learn that life is not about groups…… but it’s such a good film, so maybe we can let that one slide….. maybe.
Why should we have to put up with this?! Having someone openly ask me with a straight face: How was it to grow up in an abusive household? Simply because I didn’t have a father. In their eyes I am the ‘victim of abuse’ which honestly baffles me! We really have to be careful what we say around children as they grow up because they are sponges who will absorb these prejudices and later use them against another human.
Yes of course there are many people out there who do go through tough times and do struggle to come out the other side, however this isn’t everyone.
I can personally say that I had a wonderful upbringing and honestly wouldn’t change it for the world. I was brought up by a strong independent woman who taught me so many lessons in life: working hard, chasing your dreams, standing up for yourself and how beautiful the world is.
So to the person who tried SOOOOOOOOO hard to put me into a box- YOU FAILED.
Yes that is my history but it’s not who I am. I am proud of where I’ve come from.
So what if someone struggles after hard times or if they are fine following hard times? Everyone goes through shit in life but it’s what they choose to do afterwards that matters.
People deal with life events in very different ways. But my attitude is- they’re all positive as long as you don’t harm another human being in the process. These experiences shape us. I think people just need to accept that and accept each person for who they are, regardless of what we like/ don’t like.
Hold your head high huns because I promise you- you can be who you want, how you want and no one can ever tell you differently!
X RH X